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Night Terrors

by Bill White

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1.
sometimes i go to bed early sometimes i got to bed late when my television was working id lie in bed and stay awake now every time i close my eyes i see the worm, the worm, the worm and i surrender to the night terrors of the infirm every organ in my body seems to have shifted in position i cant get to sleep until new ones are requisitioned and im fighting against shadows that are standing in my path reciting names of the dead trampling the grapes of wrath in the darkness john coltrane plays "after the rain" my stitches are itchin and my face is swollen and ive never felt such pain but i cant scratch so i just squirm beseiged by night terrors of the infirm whiskey is bad for my stomach but it is good for my head it gives me peace of mind awake alone in a messed up bed i abandoned all my studies there was just too much to learn bodies feel nothing but their own bodies in the night terrors of the infirm maybe its enough to love someone to sing your song perhaps we were not meant to see so much or live so long
2.
V1 under the stars I think of us hearing those words of tender trust to relive … relive our love V2 under the quilt I reach for you searching for warmth that we once knew to carry… carry me through… C1 underneath the moon all alone in my room you are right there… next to me underneath the moon V3 under the sheets I touch gently sparking a flame that comforts me to nourish… nourish my dreams…. C2 underneath the moon alone in my room you are right there… completely … underneath the moon B over my control the night guides the dreams of my heart and without my consent my dreams take my heart back to you C1 underneath the moon all alone in my room you are right there… next to me underneath the moon C2 underneath the moon alone in my room you are right there… completely … underneath the moon
3.
1. Her eyes reflecting the shadows Of hours on the darkest of seas Her foots carried scares of thousands of miles that she walked to finally be free And they carry the burden of leaving the loved Those that could not walk so far and every night they call out their pain under the light of a thousand stars Chorus Run Little sister as fast as you can Run Little brother Rise to a man Run for your Mother thats left in her bed Run for the father that you know is dead Stronger and stronger for every Mile Stronger and stronger is Every child Inside the paint slowly breaks Run child you got what it takes 2. He is old with Gray hair and limping The man at the refugee camp He Still feels the bullet from theM16 When he falls asleeps in a shattering cramp And they carry the burden of leaving the loved Those that could not walk so far and every night they call out their pain under the light of a thousand stars Chorus Run Little sister as fast as you can Run Little brother Rise to a man Run for your Mother thats left in her bed Run for the father that you know is dead Stronger and stronger for every Mile Stronger and stronger is Every child Inside the paint slowly breaks Run child you got what it takes 3 The Little One cries in the silent Night The One that is here all alone Hej tried not cry and be brave and strong When he heard His Mom in the phone And they carry the burden of leaving the loved Those that could not walk so far and every night they call out their pain under the light of a thousand stars Chorus Run Little sister as fast as you can Run Little brother Rise to a man Run for your Mother thats left in här bed Run for the father that you know is dead Stronger and stronger for every Mile Stronger and stronger is Every child Inside the paint slowly breaks Run child you got what it takes
4.
the wild moves of the tectonic age were preferred to full-on controlling and i knew for sure from which side the enemy would be approaching it was the side of my face from which my ear was hanging a one eared man can tell for sure which bell is clanging before i was dropped into the batter of blood and sand i was a maker of mosaics under no mans command now i am a mosaic made of flesh and bone pieces of every man i killed oh yes, i am well-known
5.
Alpha People 02:53
there is silence in their speech they are the weakest of the weak with their nihilistic streak alpha people they are watching from the top when the fire starts to drop and you are trying to save the crops (from the) alpha people alpha people they are on the move but in the end they will always lose what they believe is only true for the alpha people not for me and you they hold the knives to cut and to carve then they decide whos's to eat and who starves who gives the orders and who serves the cause (of the) alpha people they put the poison in your ladle and stanp that shit with an FDA label they'll never touch what they put in your ltable alpha people when they call your number, kiss your ass goodbye we are the tears in their battle cry who is to live and who is to die (for the) alpha people alpha people they are on the move but in the end they will always lose what they believe is only true for the alpha people not for me and you we do the work they do the play but they are getting softer every day the time will come when we blow them away alpha people
6.
i will follow her across the sea until the hot wind blows the life out of me we will take china before china takes france and pulls down hillary's underpants hillary of troy hillary of troy these evil empires will be destroyed by hillary of troy she will be the next queen of england and the czar of russia too she will bring the shah back to iran and paint the pyramids blue hillary of troy hillary of troy these evil empires will be destroyed by hillary of troy weve got to pull together if we are to keep the floor tell the red-breasted ravens not now no never more here comes jiminey carter in ronald mcdonalds shoes a shitload of ex presidents are back and on the news hillary of troy hillary of troy these evil empires will be destroyed by hillary of troy
7.
i never owned a slave, never associated with them that did who try men on for size. as if they were shoes bought for a kid but i served with blood and honor under general robert e lee i guess most folks would call me a ghost of the confederacy you can pull down the monuments, you can lie about the war we seceded from the union because we couldnt stand no more when you raped and killed our women and burned our barns to ash we fought to stay alive, and nearly whipped your yankee ass but in the end the victory belonged to the men in blue after you wiped us out, you massacred the commanche and the sioux god damn you damn slavemongers, headhunters in the georgia woods stealing back the flesh you sold, as if people were reading post goods you pulled us back into the union under threat of a hanging tree but it was jefferson and lincoln pushing white supremacy its hard to see as equal the women mopping up your floors one day the african people will be the new conquistadoors you wear the badge of moral authority but i know you from your fruits you torture anyone who talks back to your occupying troops you are the sons of bitches gonna go down in the flood the ghosts of the choctaw indians gonna rise from the mississippi mud you still claim the moral high ground while you ride a hellbound train followers and leaders, not one will escape you scale the walls of heaven but fall into the fires of hell cant you see its you who are the true infidels and so i sing my thanks to the end of your thanksgiving i sing thanks to those who broke away and by grace continue living i sing thanks to the ghosts who rise and i dance with ghosts who fly i will march through the valley of demons and ill never salute your bloody flag again thank god ill stay a rebel to the end
8.
aint no train a runnin down these rusty tracks dont know where by babys gone but i know she wont be back aint no train a crossin trestles on the river love is a gift for free from an indian giver but im still watchin through the eyes of sleep for a woman walkin backwards back up that one way street she must be pretty old now older than me still rollin down the river into mississippi i haavent been down south since they took down the flags habent seen that woman since she unpacked her carpet bags but im still watchin through the eyes of sleep a procession movin backwards back up that one way street aint no train a runnin and the gate is locked aint nobody walkin on the streets where we walked shes up there on the mountain and the mountain road is steep i been climbin too long and now i gotta sleep they put a high price on love but life is always cheap and im looking out the window through the eyes of sleep
9.
I'm gonna buy a farm With fields open wide Gonna get some animals Most to live outside I'm gonna get some cows Some ducks and geese Maybe a few llamas Whatever I please I may get some horses Some little pigs too But above all else This is what I'll do Chorus I'm gonna sit my ass down here I'm gonna sing about the wild frontier I'm gonna invite Santa and his reindeer Yeah, I'm gonna sit my ass right down here Bridge I'll sit on the fence Like all good asses do Got no common sense My farm will be a zoo I've gotta have a possum And lots of barn cats Maybe a few turtles And some little brown bats I may get some bull frogs And several raccoons Possibly some coyotes To howl up at the moon Repeat chorus
10.
Failing and flying and falling again Wings at the start We crash in the end Failing and flying falling again I've got nothing you need You've got nothing you need to defend The head-shaking world points out our mistakes Didn't know what it took Didn't have what it takes But I've watched you come back from an afternoon swim Glowing for me Before you'd heard of him chorus All of those mornings asleep in my bed Eyes still closed to what was ahead Just like for us, now love's at an end It's not looking likely We'll ever be friends chorus People will talk we'll get a bad rap Our heads got too big Our wings melted wax But let's take some credit For moments we flew The waxwing whose slain is like me and like you Failing and flying and falling again Wings at the start We crash in the end Failing and flying falling again I've got nothing you need You've got nothing you need to defend
11.
when you wake up in the morning have a coke before your beer eat some pretzels off the floor close your eyes when you pass the mirror there no need to take a shower no reason to change your clothes nobody is coming over another day and night alone its your private party that what your life has come to now a private party no company allowed i recall your wedding day your spirits were so high you sang and danced and ran so fast you almost seemed to fly but when your husband died you stayed alone in that old house soon your friends stopped calling you and you never went out the bottle was your only friend life had become a blur the last time i saw you i couldnt even tell who you were a private party that what your life has come to now a private party no company allowed a private party beneath the sun and moon a private party that is over way too soon

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released October 29, 2022

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Bill White Lima, Peru

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