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sirens on the trash compactor sound
collectors run behind, throwing bags
somebody is in my house
i thought i locked the door
"there are three bags of garbage
hanging from your balcony"
i feel the bags
they feel filled with clothing
"why are they on the balcony?
you should have brought them to the street"
i move to move them outside
and the collector beats me to the door
"too late now. the trucks are on another street."
i shut the door behind the collector
but something pushes on it from outside
i try to force the force back
but it enters without force
i look up as it holds me down
the monster is so tall i cannot see its face
i slap the light switch on the wall
with my palms but there is no light
the monster pushes me without touching me\
into the dark kitchen
i still look up see its glowing head
but the face is too high
them it touches me
a force knocks me back
and where am i now?
was it even really here?
or was idreaming?
did it come from outer
or inner space?
and was it even really here?
i never dream of real places
but every place of place is real
the balcony, the kitchen and the door
was it even really here?
was i walking in my sleep?
is something still there watching me?
will it be back? will it return?
what does it want of me?
or was it never even here?
i have not dreamed of monsters
since i was a child
when eyeballs floated up the stairs
and witches gaurded mother's door
and i know i sleepwalked then
because i woke up in her bed
and now i wake up in my bed
even my hair is cold
and the chill spreads through my bones
like icicles
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2. |
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AARON
Ay, that I had not done a thousand more.
Even now I curse the day--and yet, I think,
Few come within the compass of my curse,--
Wherein I did not some notorious ill,
As kill a man, or else devise his death,
Ravish a maid, or plot the way to do it,
Accuse some innocent and forswear myself,
Set deadly enmity between two friends,
Make poor men's cattle break their necks;
Set fire on barns and hay-stacks in the night,
And bid the owners quench them with their tears.
Oft have I digg'd up dead men from their graves,
And set them upright at their dear friends' doors,
Even when their sorrows almost were forgot;
And on their skins, as on the bark of trees,
Have with my knife carved in Roman letters,
'Let not your sorrow die, though I am dead.'
Tut, I have done a thousand dreadful things
As willingly as one would kill a fly,
And nothing grieves me heartily indeed
But that I cannot do ten thousand more.
From titus Andronicus by William shakespeare
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3. |
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Lyrics ( Bill White) 2022
Exilium the “Battle of Cannae”
we slaughtered the savage barbarians
and regained control of the seas
now their descendants rise up against us
pushed on by a vengeful breeze
50,000 troops marched into the alps
from Africa, Carthage, and Spain
half of them starved in the mountains
frost biting their fevered brains
the ones who survived came down from the alps
too sick and enfeebled to fight
i thought it would be such an easy thing
to attack and to put them to flight
these pathetic peons deserved to die
for setting foot on roman soil
we cut them down but they rose again
throwing our spirit into a turmoil
they faced us like a crescent moon
our numbers were their double
but they broke through and drove us back
until we were no more than rubble
how could such a well-ordered advance
be made by this unruly horde
they trampled us down forcing us to retreat
before we could draw our swords
surrounded now, we lost the day
our wounds ran bloody red
when we limped off the battlefield
leaving 80,000 dead
when i returned home in disgrace
i was despised by all
my armies decimated
still Rome refused to fall
and Rome in time prevailed
against this savage horde
and in the blood of Hannibal's suicide
an empire was born
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4. |
Backwards Pricing
04:34
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the truckers union has blocked all entrances to the city
and they are shooting any wildcat truckers trying to bring supplies in
now the prices are so high on the fruit rotting in the street
that the market value of fruit juice manufacturers has skyrocketed
and guess who bought up most of their stock the week before
this is the sponge that comes free with the soap
it costs more than the soap alone
three coins for the soap and sponge
five coins for the sponge
a one litre soft drink sells for one coin
a two litre soft drink sells for three coins.
why dont people buy two one litre bottles
the price of ice cream is higher in the summer
because there is more demand for it
since they sell more units in summer
they would make more money
if they lowered their price per unit
instead of raising it.they would undersell the competition
and come out ahead
but try telling the shopkeepers that
it can get pretty dicey
this backwards pricing
it is anything but anagogic
when greed wins out over logic
quinoa is a perfect grain
and has kept peruvians healthy for centuries
when the gringos discovered it
and began importing it and selling it at
monstrously inflated prices
the prices in peru rose so high
that peruvians could no longer afford it
when the peanut farmer jimmy carter
became president of the united states
all the peanut butter disappeared from supermarket shelves
when it returned. the price had tripled
it can get pretty dicey
this backwards pricing
it is anything but anagogic
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5. |
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Pungent / tilted pulpy streets decreased in width and I haven’t seen a good-looking vibe all day. Repulsive / they appear to me as grotesque vomit figures. It is hard to convince myself that this is an illusion, that I am trapped within it. Scared / I have to admit that I am here in a world wheregrass can become snakes or lilies with teeth sinking into my feet and I am in a bright box in the madhouse cellar. Stagnant / how much longer can it last? Jesus Saves / the poster drips blood, spattering the terrain. Here / the lady on the bus is missing a leg and her friend is half-plastic. Why / is she staring at me? Where / is the exit? No/ the gun is not the exit. Neither is the knife. I’m not digging it at all, not at all. The sun is trying to trick me into meeting its gaze. It is so beautiful and I can’t resist its beauty. Turn around aand look at the moon. SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTSSPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS SPOTS. Some chick is telling me the spots are from the devil. The spots will not go away. The spots will not disappear. God / help me, cleanse me, take me away from here. Out / demons, out. God / I cant look at them, please. It is all too repulsive. I don’t want to see the sun I don’t want to see the moon. Our father / or THE SPOTS THE SPOTS or The Fire / it is squeezing my brain. Squeeze / I can’t stand it goddam it leave me alone I can’t stand it squeeZing goddam it HELP ME! There is an idiot on the corner. He is talking to me. He is talking to keep himself normal. There is an idiot on the corner. He is saying, “Praise be to God for he controls the Universe. Praise be to man for the man who brings the bread to the king is starving. Overthrow the king! Absolve him of his mask! Let each man be fed, protected, and treated equally no matter what his trade. Why should a man work a trade he abhors simply to eat better than hisneighbor who enjoys his job? LET EACH MAN PURSUE THE WORK OF HIS CHOICE WITHOUT DEPRIVAL OF HIS RIGHT TO FEAST! America, you are wasting everything, even your bandages. All your cartons of cold cream are being poured into a bottomless wound. America, swallow your pride and regurgitate the truth. You can’t bullshit the Milky Way.” There is an idiot on the corner.There is a nail in his foot and he is afraid to have it removed. If you can’t find the exit, then look for a new entrance. Don’t rupture yourself on the repetition. Oh, protogozalefruojaw this is it! No twist, no release. The universe no longer circulates through the ruins of myself.
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6. |
On the Beach
03:35
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when there is no place left to go
and the keys are out of reach
who is goge beaching to water the lawn
when the cabana boys are on the beach
looking up to the sky
looking out to the sea
we didnt see them coming
until the light fell on the beach
the only sounds from the radio
are the fragments of a speech
all that remains from the saturday dance
is shattered on the beach
looking up to the sky
looking out to the sea
we didnt see them coming
until the light fell on the beach
all we had in common
was the trauma of release
when the wind was flashing and our lives
were washed up on the beach
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7. |
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when my primary brain malfunctions
my back up brain kicks in
im sitting on the toilet i dont understand
where the toilet paper is then like a revelation i see that its in my right hand
but i cant remember if ive used it or not.
its kind of sticky but is white so it must only be snot
i pull up my pants but i dont feel no traction
when my primary brain goes on the blink
my back up brain goes into action
my baby is going through men-o-pause
while i am suffering mental-pause
yesterday i ask her if she was still a virgin
today i forget what long ago i was learnin
i put my hat on my fist thinking was a glove
sometime i confuse the below from above
i got one shoe on my head and the other on my nose
when my primary brain goes blank
i give my back up brain a yank
ive been cutting so many brain farts
that the anus in my brain is getting torn apart
and it hurts when i try to cram more information in
when i try to sing the alphabet my head goes into a spin
sometimes i get lost and cant remember where ive been
when my primary brain malfunctions
my back up brain kicks in
anf nobdy can tell me that i dont know whats goin on
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8. |
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BILL:
what did they find?
what did they find?
buried so deep
deep in the ground
buried so deep
deep in my mind
what have i hidden?
what has been found
deep in the ground
what did they find?
deep in my mind
buried so deep
uncovered in sleep
unconscious guilt
secrets are spilt
bodies are found
buried deep under ground
buried so deep
yet they speak
yes, they speak
Nahlej:
What did they see
What did they see
Buried so deep
Deep in the earth
Buried so deep
Deep in my mind
What have I lost
What will be found
Deep in the earth
What do they see
Deep in my mind
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9. |
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when the chest is removed
from your arm
and the fat is binded
to your skin
i will lessen my grip
to relieve all of this
negative pressure
i could use some of that right now
your negative pressure
i want to know how it feels to be born
i want to feel like popcorn
fill the dent in my chest with brandy
fill the holes in my shoes with cotton candy
give it to me baby
til the decks run red
from negative pressure in my head
when the sitches are removed
from the quilt
and the law of the beast reads
"do what thou wilt "
ill cut the glass in your broach
turn a rat into a coach
through negative pressure
the world is screaming
for such an alliance
every time the baker mixes
magic with science
i could use some of that right now
your negative pressure
i want to know how it feels to be born
i want to feel like popcorn
fill the dent in my chest with brandy
fill the holes in my shoes with cotton candy
give it to me baby
til the decks run red
from negative pressure in my head
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10. |
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SONYA: What can we do? We must live out our lives. [A pause] Yes, we shall live, Uncle Vanya. We shall live all through the endless procession of days ahead of us, and through the long evenings. We shall bear patiently the burdens that fate imposes on us. We shall work without rest for others, both now and when we are old. And when our final hour comes, we shall meet it humbly, and there beyond the grave, we shall say that we have known suffering and tears, that our life was bitter. And God will pity us. Ah, then, dear, dear Uncle, we shall enter on a bright and beautiful life. We shall rejoice and look back upon our grief here. A tender smile -- and -- we shall rest. I have faith, Uncle, fervent, passionate faith. We shall rest. We shall rest. We shall hear the angels. We shall see heaven shining like a jewel. We shall see evil and all our pain disappear in the great pity that shall enfold the world. Our life will be as peaceful and gentle and sweet as a caress. I have faith; I have faith. [Wiping away her tears] My poor, poor Uncle Vanya, you are crying! [Weeping] You have never known what it is to be happy, but wait, Uncle Vanya, wait! We shall rest. We shall rest. We shall rest.
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