my god, you're a horrible girlfriend
you are not even much of a friend
when jack nichlolson called me on the phone
you picked up on the other end
after i hung up
you stayed on the line
he invited you to his party
and in the morning you were no longer mine
when i picked up de niro at the airport
you jumped into my back seat
you had to get in on the action
with him and john belushi
you never saw me as your boyfriend
to you i was just a chauffeur
but m going to vegas
with gina gershon
im gonna spend the weekend with her
one bad turn deserves another
and sour grapes make bad wine
but if thats all there is to drink
im gonna drink it and have a good time
so this is what its really like
to date an out of work beauty queen
whose always got her eye out
to hitch a ride on somebodys dream
this hollywood life is such a drag
but i admit it has its perks
and it beats my indiana farm
where theres nothing to do but work
and one bad turn deserves another
and sour grapes make bad wine
but if thats all there is to drink
im gonna drink it and have a good time
credits
from Slats in the Bed,
released October 5, 2022
written and performed by bill white
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