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The Human Conditional

by Bill White

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1.
I wrote 100 songs last year I should have written more Im not getting any younger im already 64 Some say everything worth singing has been sung but I don’t think that’s true Theres an infinity of melody inside each one of you We are uconditionally human trapped in the human condition If theres a human conditional where can I find it What is inside it and who is behind it I wish I had studies physics I dont know the first thing about quantum theory And I feel like Im falling out of sight nto the rain, darkness, and artificial light The loudest shout is the saddest why To be resurrected then to die
2.
He said he was an athiest I asked him what kind He answered Protestaant I lathered his behind The pulled out his claws\ I am the law! No need to fill out any forms Its easier this year Just give me half of everything And you will be in the clear with the law I am the law! You are an eyewitness I dont care what you saw My testimony is all that counts Ill stick the rest in your jaw I am the law! Dont tell me your alibi Ill have it thrown out of court Your only chance to beat the rap Is to sign my report And withdraw I am the law!
3.
Im nothing much more than a ghost around here The only thing that reminds me that Im alive is the pain Im at the blackjack table but the table is clean Still Im waiting for an ace to match my queen my friemds have fallen one by one and I cant even grieve venthe gamblers have left town And I have nothing left to believe nothing left to believe nothing left to believe ive lost my faith in this casino world nothing left to believe theres no way you can win at blackjack unless you get the deal i got nothing to fall back on i bet everything on the roulette wheel i could find myself a single room die in there alone on a second hand bed with buggy sheets in a strangers home but ill stay with those who hate me who poison my food and my mind but when they clean up y flesh and blood im gonna leave some things behind you all know life is rotten in the USA some say they want to go back to the simpler days those old days were no better a woman crucified on a red letter a man on trial for knowing how life begins a woman facing death for hiding a bottle of gin children burned alive by the FBI extortion and eviction if you dont conply assassinations of elected presidents charie chapin deported because they said he was a red kennedy is sacrificed to speed the winds of war phil ochs is strangled to keep him from singing anymore the ripping of the ozpne by atomic bomb tests is blamed on the using of aeresol deodereats some will lie for the power of office others kill for the crown the pain of seeing trump go up was balanced by seeing clinton go down it was ronald reagan whp talked about a simpler time and ronald reagan was never any friend of mine those who reveal the truth are hated the perfidious liars are loved but in the end they are nothing but pieces of garbage to get rid of when sin is virtue and virtue is sin we are left with nothng to believe in nothing left to believe nothing left to believe ive lost my faith in this casino world nothing left to believe
4.
5.
Brown tobacco stains on my dentures yellow tobacco stains on my fingers and hands Ive lived my life in Marlboro country now they tell me I have to change my brand My daddy told me smoking was fine as long as your cgarettes were the right kind Its death to all species of mammal to suck on a filterless camel But even if Winston tasted good it wasn’t make the way a cigarette should It had a filter that was filled with fiberglass cut up your lungs like a mower cuts grass And if you suck so low to smoke a n Elite-a you might as well suck on a buttt off of the street-a My boy your fate will be sealed if you play the tough guy with the chesterfirlds One puff off a virgina slim you wont remember if you’re a her or a him And don’t nod your head in assent if some reporter offers you a kent And if you smoke in the bathroom at school don’t let the hall monitor catch you with a kool Now all the advice my daddy gave me is archaic and not relevant these days Bcause the cigarette machine at the factory aint stocking any of those brands anyways They got tobacco enhanced with plutonium you can puff but you wont blow any smoke They got cigarettes filled with marijuana but you get dizzy after only one toke You can take your nicotime intravaneously t hey’ve even turned tobacco into gum Im hiding out with my rolling papers and an old rusty tin of drum When that is gone ill pack away my memories all of the pleasure and the pain I wont ever smoke another marboro but I still still have my tobacco stains Brown tobacco stains on my dentures yellow tobacco stains on my hands I ve lived a good life in Marlboro country in Marlboro country ill make my last stand
6.
The Toymaker 02:33
Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He can make a boy into a girls and a girl into a boy Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He gave me a pair of arms I thanked him very well When he took my arms away I cursed him back to hell Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys When he was passing out brains, I though he said trains\so I asked for an empty boxcar When he gave me the breath of life it cut like a knife and left me with these pox scars Hes the toymaker and he made us all the same So if your brother falls you have just yourself to blame Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He sliced away my scalp them filled me up with sand When the sand runs out he’ll drop me from his hand Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys You thought he was jim dandy when he handed out the candy And you asked for a dish and a spoon When you wish upon a star it doesn’t matter who you are Your wishes they aint never coming true Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He can turn boys into girls and girls into boys Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He gave me a pair of arms I thanked him very well When he took my arms away I cursed him back to hell Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys When he was passing out brains, I though he said trains\so I asked for an empty boxcar When he gave me the breath of life it cut like a knife and left me with these pox scars Hes the toymaker and he made us all the same So if your brother falls you have just yourself to blame Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He cut me to the quick them filled me up with sand When the sand runs out he’ll drop me from his hand Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys You thought he was jim dandy when he was passing out the candy And you asked for a dish and a spoon When you wish upon a star it doesn’t matter who you are Your wishes they aint never coming true Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys He turns your plow into a sword then back into a plow If you didn’t see it it then you had better listen now Hes the toymaker Maker of the toys
7.
In the valley below the volcano The children of industry were born Some were rised by their mothers Their fathers were killed in the war They were the first generation without inheritance or name Their mothers worked the shift at midnight and they were raised in the rain Raised in the rain webbed feet and muddy hems pockets stained by m and ms Hopping freights to californina thrown off the top of the trains the world is ruled by deesrt flowers and we were raised by the rain Most never went to college but they kept on reading books working crummy jobs when they could get them going from janitor to dishwasher to cook now and then id sell a poem that 20 bucks bought a lot of beans most days i fingered the coin returns of newspaper boxes and candy machines raised in the rain rooming houses and minimum wage two cents for lemomade me and freddie the wise m n hunkered down in a hurricane he was from the windy city and i was raised in the rain i rode the back of a bus to boston then htched to tennessee no matter how you slice it a 20 is just two tens i found out the hard way that you cant go home again raised in the rain raised in the rain most of us have lost our mothers but we still have the rain
8.
B flat m - E flat m - B – A - A flat m E flat m - B flat m - B - A A flat m He turned away from the tree to feast upon the flesh of beasts Thrown down from the outer clouds into the gristle chorus What is the measure of a man Is he a soft machine for eating beasts Or is he a dainty meal for the beasts What is the measure of a man Drinking from a cemetary sewer why wont you let the dead rest in peace Intelligent people are fewer and fewer but there are more and more police repeat chorus Children fall from fairground rides orangatangs wear human hides women dress in bloody rags of skin and fins and fur repeat chorus your gunny filled with human skulls you creepers of the night youll find your inner darkness with a lantern of artificial light repear chorus
9.
"Life is ao long" she said to me On the slowest of her days "I woke up insde a painting In that painting I stay| They gave her baths that lasted hours Shocks between the pourings Strapped into a bed They took away everything Except the misery in her head I knew her when she was young A beauty to behold I know her even better now That she is broken, sick, and old "All that I was meant to be Was burned up in a song The hours that are left to me Inconsolably long"
10.
I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning You'll be sleeping on the floor While Im walking out the door I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning Your car aint gonna start on monday Your car aint gonna start on monday You can jump it you can pump it but youre only gonna flood it Your car aint gonna start on monday Tuesdays gonna be your bad news day Tuesdays gonna be your bad news day If your having a bad day Its gonna get worse in every way Tuesdays gonna be your bad news day Wednesday will not be lets be friends day Wednesday will not be lets be friends day If you try to get sincere Ill box your goddam ears Wednesday will not be lets be friends day The lights will go out on thursday afternoon The lights will go out on thursday afternoon You can ring a bell Bit I wont follow you into hell The lights will go out on thursday afternoon I wont be frying your fish on friday night I wont be frying your fish on friday night You can scream or you can mutter But Im plum clean out of butter I wont be frying your fish on friday night On saturday ill say a prayer for you On saturday ill say a prayer for you Go ahead and eat your pie Today is the day you die On saturday ill say a prayer for you I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning The table will be bare There wont be no food anywhere I wont be flippin your flapjacks sunday morning
11.
If Not Now 02:44
we slept through the shaking and the breaking of the crust upon our awaking the water covered us you say this cant be happening and maybe you are right but if the tide isn’t out by the afternoon we will drown in it tonight if not now it is to come if it is not to come let it be now the ocean is trespassing against the borders of our shore and even our ancestors will be swallowed by its roar watching the horizon with no intention to retreat they say heaven only knows which fate we shall meet other lands have weapons to keep them safe at the bottom f the world we are protected by the mercy of the saints the wild dogs are warnng us to take to higher ground but with paralyzed eyes we hold tight to holy ground a kingdeome of whales in eddys they swirl culd this b the wave that will drown the whole world
12.
Footprints 03:27
Walking on air Leaving no foorprints Anywhere Or on anyone When I go rising above acres of snow Nobody will lnow I had been here at all I left no footprints There once was a girl So sadly and madly devoted to me I read her autobiography There was no mention of me I left no footprints Some say there is a taple Where everyne has a place But nothing has been written That cannot be erased In the trembling of an eyelid The years flickered away The world was mine for the taking But \i let it pass away Leaving no footprints I scratch my right foot With my left foot Anf my left with my right On the wet side of the window The stars shine bright Light is lighter than air Shining on everyone Everywhere Leaving no footprints

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released June 30, 2018

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Bill White Lima, Peru

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